Happy 2011, friends!
It was very revealing to me as I read Facebook updates over the course of the last week to see SO many friends lamenting that 2010 was less than great for them. Maybe I've been burying my head in the sand, but I honestly didn't think 2010 was all that bad. It wasn't fantastic, but I can't say that I was sooooooooooo ready for it to be over, like many people apparently were. Nonetheless, time passes, and at the stroke of midnight last night, we embarked on a new decade. Let's see what this chance to begin again will bring...
I didn't make any resolutions. I don't usually make them, but I at least *think* about them - even though they inevitable turn out to be empty promises. This year I didn't even pretend. Sure, I'd like to maintain my health, approach my life with gratitude, be more compassionate towards others with whom I share this planet, and try to view the world with more understanding, but none of these things need to be "resolved" at the drop of a Swarovski-encrusted ball. I've felt the need to do these things since I've been spending time on a mat every now and then. I've NOT felt the need to do these things through my Bikram practice, however, and I've finally decided that's what bugs me about Bikram (ha ha! I bet you were wondering when I'd get around to the subject that the title of my post alludes to!!!). Here's my statement about it: Bikram is for people who don't like yoga.
Since my "Bikram-Part 1" post, I've visited the 100 degree studio twice more, and boy, did I get put through my paces. I sweat my butt off, was most definitely challenged by a hard workout (each time I get the "I just got my ass handed to me" feeling), but definitely didn't get the right kind of post-yoga glow that I yearn for. I got a glow, alright - my face was beat red - but I haven't yet left the Bikram studio with a kinder feeling towards man-kind. I've never left with a generosity of spirit. There is literally no time for a meditative experience - hell, you're not even allowed to close your eyes as you breathe deeply.
I've experienced 3 different teachers, and while they put their subtle stamps on the practice, because it is a sequence of 26 poses for a specific amount of time, and the instructor talks for the entire 90 minutes, there really isn't any leeway. No customization. No moments where they inspire you to feel gratitude for what your body is able to accomplish. No chances for you to appreciate your own spirit and honor the practice. You are in a room with other people, and the instructor reminds you that you are all practicing as one. You can't be the weak link in the chain, otherwise you will be letting everyone else down. You have to push, push, push and make it through. Hold the pose for 60 seconds. Don't close your eyes. Don't leave the room. You start as one, you must finish as one. I guess if that sort of "drill sargeant" mentality is your thing, you might appreciate this sort of workout, but that's not why I love or practice yoga.
Yes, you sweat, but as I mentioned before, you aren't sweating because it was super-yoga - the 26 postures, honestly, aren't that challenging as far as yoga postures go. You are sweating buckets because the room is heated to 100 degrees. You feel sore and tired the next day because you exercised in a 100 degree room. If you think about it, you could sweep the floor in a 100 degree room, sweat your ass off and feel sore and tired the next day. In between my 2nd and 3rd tries, I took a regular 60 minute class with Josh, and it had to be the best thing I did all week ♥ I left feeling happy, I left feeling proud of my body, I left feeling grateful for having the time and good fortune to practice with Josh...and you know what, I even left feeling a little sweaty ;)
So, the second time I did Bikram, I was a trooper and got up to make it to the 6:30 am class - I figured if I just got up and got the workout out of the way, I'd have the whole day to do other things. I was one of 4 students. The other 3 students, were obviously regulars, as the instructor knew them by name and had a familiar banter with them, and I really felt like I was holding them back because I was "new". There was intense pressure to "keep up". Disclosure: the pressure was TOTALLY self-imposed. The instructor kept speaking to me and individualizing the instruction, which is what a good instructor is supposed to do, but as a long-time yogi, I didn't need explanation as to what Triangle pose or head-of-the-knee pose are. I just needed a little patience because I was getting used to these poses in the heat. But there just seems like there is no time for patience due to the nature of the 26 posture sequence. I made it through, attempted every single posture, and left with a sense of amazement that the other three people there apparently do this on a regular basis.
The third time, I once again found myself in a class of 30+ people (apparently, the classes this week were fuller than normal due to the extra holiday time off people had). I did a morning class...but a more respectable 9:30, and the instructor was by far my favorite of the three. She looked strict, but once the practice was underway, I could tell she had a sense of humor that the other two were lacking. Not that the other two were "mean"; they certainly enjoyed what they were doing and cared about doing the postures correctly. This third instructor, seemed kind. She conveyed an understanding that some postures need to be "worked up to", and she actually found a way to interject a few gems of yogic philosophy here and there. But there is still a rigidity to the sequence that must not be altered. You know, I'd bet she would be a great Hatha teacher. I was able to complete the practice. When I felt dizzy or lightheaded, I didn't push myself this time, and I didn't feel guilty about it either - I didn't seem to be diminishing the experience of the die-hard Bikram devotees in the room.
So, that's about it. Will there be a "part 4"? Well, I'm not writing it off, just like I wouldn't write-off a spin on the elliptical. Bikram is still a good workout, and if I am looking to take a yoga class, and this is the most convenient one, I'll do it. 90 minutes is a lot of time to spend on myself, though, so I can't envision these classes being "the most convenient" very often. But, "never say never"...
May the light that shines in every dimension of life inspire and guide our inner vision throughout the year ahead - paraphrased from the Gayatri mantra
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