Saturday, June 30, 2012

We're just warming up!

Are you ever lucky enough to arrive "early" for a yoga class?  I'm usually the gal who is there just a moment before the instructor begins with just enough time to find a spot, unroll my mat, and sit down.  Truth is, I don't know what to do with myself if I do happen to get there any earlier.  Do you find a pal and strike up a conversation, only to have it overheard by everyone else in the room and need to awkwardly end it when the instructor comes in to begin?  If not, do you sit there like an anti-social dolt completely avoiding eye contact? (that would probably end up being me!)   There is only so long you can scrutinize the sole of your foot.  Maybe you take yourself as a serious yogi and begin a meditation of some sort.  Come on, isn't it just easier to sneak in at the last second?  **Although, I must admit that my sneaking in at the last second is rarely planned or thought out - it's oftentimes the result of suburban traffic or straggling kids.
On Saturday, I had the opportunity to take a studio yoga class (hey, I broke down and bought a class card, so I have 10 classes to squeeze in before the end of summer!), and I got there a whole 3 minutes early.  I hadn't scrutinized the schedule, and when I arrived, the instructor informed me that it was a level 2/3 class.  I asked if I needed any special props, and she said "Well, you know your own practice, so get any blocks, straps, or blankets you need..."
The class wasn't packed - maybe 8 students - I grabbed a blanket, and easily found a place to unroll my mat that wasn't awkwardly close to anyone else. I found a comfortable seat, and waited for the class to begin; I was the only one sitting still.  The guy in front, decked head-to-toe in Lululemon (even his mat!) was doing some spinal twists.  The lady next to him was busy rolling her hips over a bolster.  The chica two mats away from me was doing some Pilates warm-ups, and the gal right next to me was using a strap to do some forward folds.  I started wondering if maybe the teacher had poked her head in and given some instruction to these early-arrivers that I had missed.  This was a "Level 2/3 class", afterall!
I refused to be intimidated by these go-getters.  I just sat in my "criss-cross applesauce" comfortable seat and waited.  I didn't do any breathing exercises, no warm-ups for me.  I kept it in the back of my mind that if it was a level 2/3 class, I was about to be worked over pretty hard, and I didn't want to waste any bit of energy on some impressive warm-up techniques.
You know what?  Sitting still worked for me.  Sure, I felt a bit awkward being the only one in the class who was not loosening up, but by the end of practice, I'm quite sure no one was wondering why I hadn't done any pre-practice exercises.  Then again, if they were wondering, it doesn't matter.  I didn't come to the class to impress or justify anything to them.  I came to the class for myself.  If I want to wait for practice to begin by sitting there patiently, I can sit there patiently.  No need for pre-practice gymnastics or bizarre breathing patterns.  On Saturday, they were my three extra minutes - three minutes without whining 5 year-olds, a beckoning pile of laundry, or neighborhood leaf-blowers.  Just sitting there and enjoying was the proverbial calm before the storm of the "Level 2/3 class".
Next time you find yourself lucky enough to arrive 3 minutes early for a yoga class, by all means, do what you feel most comfortable doing as you warm-up,  waiting for practice to begin.  Just know that if I'm on the mat next to you, I'm going to be enjoying my 3 minutes to the fullest - by sitting there and doing nothing.

ps - I made it through the class, for the win.

"It is through your body that you realize you are a spark of divinity" - B.K.S. Iyengar

Finding time...

Ah, summer is here, and I have all the time in the day to practice whenever I'd like.  Right?  Well, not exactly.  I still have these little people who live in my home, called Children, who need some level of care and supervision, so I'm not able to just jaunt off to a studio for a class whenever I'd like.  And there were 2 times yesterday that I wanted to do so, and these "Children" and their "needs" just got in the way!

I'm being cheeky here.  I love my children dearly, and I wouldn't have my life ANY other way.  Husband and I have been married for nearly 12 years, and children have only been a part of our life for the last 8.  I can barely remember what life was like before them, and I can't imagine what life would be like without them.  How could you NOT love children when you have an exchange like this at the ripe hour of 6:30am? (Child #2:  Mommy, can you please scratch my back?  Me: Yes, but what are you going to do when I'm not around to scratch your back?  C2:  I'll get a wife.  But I DO NOT like girls.  Me:  That might be a bit of a problem.  C2: Well, I'll wait and see.  Maybe when I turn into a grown up, I'll like girls......  Can you just scratch my back?)

Yesterday morning, Child #1 was at swim team practice at the bright, early hour of 8am.  He is motivated to be there, especially after staying up late each night to watch Phelps and Lochte in the Olympic trials.  Child #2 goes to morning camp at 9, leaving me just enough time to make it to a 9:30 studio yoga class.  My plans were in place....but the studio class ended at 10:45, meaning that Child #2 would be left alone after practice for 45 minutes.  It didn't work out for me to go.  After chatting with Husband, he explained that he was going to work a half-day (in the summertime, bosses are a little more forgiving with the Friday clock-out time), so maybe I could take the 4:00 studio class.  It was a great opportunity, and if I left at 3:30, accounting for heavy summer Friday traffic, I would be able to make it.  Only problem, Husband's "half-day" meant leaving work at 3.  Catching a 3:10 train meant he wouldn't be home before 3:45 - really not enough time to make it to the studio.  So, backup plan was also foiled.

Almost.  I remembered that I was trying to do yoga.  I can do yoga ANYWHERE.  Including my living room.  Enter backup plan 2: I decided to revive my home practice.  I figure if I'm going to become a yoga teacher, I might as well get used to leading a practice, and what better way to get started than with myself?!?

I unrolled my trusty striped yellow mat (I save that beauty for special occasions - like practicing at home, since my Manduka mat picks up lint from the carpet a whole lot easier than Old Yeller does!) and got to it.  I started in downdog and took several deep breaths while deciding what to do.  I could feel the stress and frustration from the day melting away - I imagined it dripping down my back and pooling at my hands, and I started moving.

The practice wasn't perfect, but I threw in some vinyasas, and built my way through the familiar postures, adding one after each round.  Downdog, plank, chaturanga, updog, downdog, low lunge.  Repeat on left.  Second round:  Downdog, plank, chaturanga, updog, downdog, low lunge, warrior 1.  Repeat on left.  Third round:  Downdog, plank, chaturango, updog, downdog, low lunge, warrior 1, warrior 2.  Repeat on left.  And so on.
Sound nice?  It was.  I should have put on some nice, mellow music, slowed everything down with some deep breathing, lingering in each pose...but I have plenty of time to make it better.  Hopefully someday I'll be ready to guide you on the mat!

"...joy's soul lies in the doing" - W. Shakespeare, Troilus and Cressida

Friday, June 29, 2012

Balancing in the dark...

An interesting thing happened on the mat yesterday.  Now that school is out and I have a short respite from shuffling my children around after school, I have more time to take yoga classes at the gym (where there's childcare for said children). I was taking Josh's Thursday afternoon session, which started off boringly similar to his Wednesday morning session: lying flat on the mat, breathing in and out for the first 5 minutes of class.  As he usually does, Josh redeemed himself by mixing it up a bit, although it did take a while to get to the stuff that usually gets your heart rate up.  (This is what happened on Wednesday - after a long, slow warm up, we were doing plank to chaturanga to plank again, which is basically a hard-core military push up.  Trust me, it is  h-a-r-d.).  Thursday's class transitioned into some abdominal work - not as hard as the Wednesday arm work, but enough to make you feel it where it counts.  By the time we transitioned into the standing postures, I guessed that this would be a more introspective practice, and that's just where Josh went with it.
Sometimes, all you're meant to do in a yoga practice is "notice" things.  Notice the way your body responds to certain postures;  notice which postures force your mind to wander, and which bring attention back to your center.  When the flow of the class moved on to Tree pose, I knew that's what this practice was about, and I was determined to "notice" how my body responded to Tree.  The class was guided to stand firmly on the left leg, and bring the heel of the right foot to touch the left ankle.  This is called a "grounded tree", and with your right foot acting like a little kickstand, it isn't generally that challenging to balance.  BUT, Josh asked us to flutter our eyes closed - and I lost it (balance, that is!).
This simple action of removing visual cues really challenged my sense of balance.  I was surprised at how much I wobbled around, how much I was forced to engage my core to stand still, how I was so tempted to peek an eye open.  Following this, we opened our eyes and put ourselves into regular tree, with the right foot coming up the left leg as far as is comfortable.  We kept our eyes open this time, and I found this usually very challenging posture to be quite a bit easier compared to the eyes-closed-kickstand tree!
We repeated the pose on the other side, but this time I knew what to expect.  I changed my drishti (focus of gaze), just to see if I would notice any differences.  Wouldn't you know it, I did!  The first time around, my focus was on a spot on the horizon (well, the place where the wall meets the ceiling, as we were indoors) - I was looking out into the future.  I didn't know what was coming, figuratively and literally, so when our eyes fluttered closed, I was unstable, unsteady, wobbly.  The second time around, I purposely focused instead on the tip of my nose.  This time, I was looking at the present - where I stood at that moment in time.  I knew where I was, I knew what I was doing, and I wasn't nearly as imbalanced.
How did this speak to me?  It brought awareness that whenever I feel imbalanced, it may be better to shift focus - instead of worrying about what's coming next, think instead about the here and now.  Focus on where I am and what my purpose is, and I'll have a much better foundation (in practice AND in life).

Either that, or I just have better balance on my right leg!

"It's not what you look at that matters, it's what you see." - Henry David Thoreau

Wednesday, June 27, 2012

Would ya quit staring?

I have been casually reading a book on yoga:  The Spirit and Practice of Moving Into Stillness by Erich Schiffman.  It was recommended to me by a yoga teacher, who thought I might enjoy it as I continue on my yoga journey.  I picked up the book, figuring it would be an easy read, but it's turning out to be some heavy, philosophical stuff.  It's anything but "light"...I've been dipping in and out of the text for about 3 weeks now, and I'm only on page 33 (the book has 300+ pages!).  The Introduction covers the author's personal path to finding yoga, and the first part of the book goes into your core of goodness and why yoga should be a part of your life.  This is the part that I'm in the middle of covering, and I've paused on a short section called "Eye Contact During the Day".

Schiffman is explaining something he calls the "Third Dimension" of yoga - one where you've recognized the truth within, and are ready to seek it out in others.  Since you've recognized the truth within yourself, seeing the truth in others allows you to see bits of yourself in them, reinforcing the yogic idea that we are all part of the same energy/fiber/fabric/existence.  He concludes with several "exercises designed to actualize all of this".  One of them is this concept of Eye Contact During the Day.

Basically, Schiffman is recommending you to make eye contact with others, his words: "Practice looking in the eyes of others...be interested in 'going in there' and seeing them."  Hmmmm....how exactly is this accomplished without freaking people out?  Especially when he commands: "Let them see you seeing them". This was the line that got me.  I mean, to close friends and acquaintances, I suppose I would be able to explain that I'm practicing this "gazing" mediation, and they might understand.  Most might wonder if I was experimenting with Jedi Mind Tricks, and promptly bump me down a few notches on the scale of "people you want to spend more time with".  As I run out of friends to do this with, I'll have to move down the line to acquaintances...  Now, acquaintances don't really know much more about me than my name and perhaps some mutual interests, but they probably won't want to know ANY more about me once they see me going "back and forth (from eye to eye) until you find them and then beam in on them"!


What is it about eye contact that makes people uneasy?  Is it the fact that our eyes are like windows into our soul; a place where you cannot hide your true emotions, try as you might?  I'm willing to go out on a short limb here and say yes.  How many times have you said hi to someone, and their mouth smiles back, says hi, but their eyes do not? (I'm not talking about Botox, here)  Why are we so afraid of letting people see how we really feel?  I think this is what the passage in the book is getting at - being honest with yourself allows you to be honest with others, and in turn, prepare you to receive honesty from them.

Making eye contact for the sake of honesty does seem important...but not to the point of being invasive.  I'll admit that I have quite a few insecurities, but I am working hard to free myself from them.  I am finding that it is not that easy.  I'm starting with being more friendly - and this is proving to be a challenge, especially when people I am trying to be friendly with aren't being friendly in return.  This generates more insecurities in me (why didn't that person say hi back to me?  why aren't people including me?  am I not fun to be around?  am I annoying?  maybe I'm un-cool.  did I say something stupid or offensive?)  I've gotta get over it.  There are a million reasons why people aren't friendly - maybe they're shy, maybe they are distracted, maybe they have no social skills, or they're just rude.  It's not up to me to figure out why.  I have to surrender the insecurities and just be "ME".  Without using Jedi Mind Tricks on people, so don't worry.  I plan to give this eye contact thing a try, but not to the point where I'm invading people's emotions or seeing things that they don't want me to see.  Just a brief gaze into those windows will send a loud enough message that I care about what someone is saying to me, and I value the time spent interacting together.  No staring or "beaming in" necessary.

You're being in the same world together, acknowledging one another's existence. - E. Schiffman, 1996

Tuesday, June 12, 2012

Can't stop thinking about this.



Get ready to be blown away.  I have been since I first saw this video, and can't stop thinking about it.
Okay, Yoga isn't about this.  But it is no less awe-inspiring to see a talented practitioner and wonder what it takes to get there.  I can't begin to imagine how many hours of practice Briohny has logged in to reach this stage of lithe...and she's probably not snacking on Pirates Booty as she sits at her laptop blogging away (that would be ME).  The thing is, it always brings me back to the realization that there is always somewhere for my yoga practice to go.
7 years in, I can do some pretty impressive things - things that I couldn't dream of doing when I started.  But, like LIFE, my practice is a journey.  A journey that can't possibly be complete after 7 years on the mat or 70 years on the mat.  Truth be told, as serious as she is, Briohny is likely having FUN, and I can't wait to have fun, too.
Please share your thoughts on the video.  Crazy?  Inspirational? Soft porn?  A lofty pipe-dream?  Plain and simple, I just love it.

Here's the motto of the Month for Sagittariuses (courtesy of Harper's Bazaar): No amount of darkness can hide a spark of light.  For Leos: Be good or be good at it.  

Sunday, June 10, 2012

Hey! Slow Down!

My hydrangea is gradually blooming,
lengthening it's time of beauty.
Things are blooming in my garden....and I'm missing it!
Lately, life has been zipping by so fast that I feel like I'm barely keeping my head above water.  Quite a few times in the last 2 weeks, I have felt my head slipping below the surface, days when my "to do" list is impossibly long, I'm double booked all over the place.  The worst is when there is a list just as long for the next day, with no relief in sight, and I just don't see how I can get it all done.  Something's gotta give!
Yes, anyone with children knows how busy June is.  As schools wrap up for the year, there are performances, celebratory field trips, end-of-year festivals and BBQs, added in with the usual monthly birthday parties, sports commitments, and your time suddenly is not your own.  This year seems particularly worse than in years previous, and I find myself juggling and struggling to keep up.
When you think about it, our modern way of life is built around efficiency and multi-tasking.  In fact, if you aren't juggling something, you are just an under-achiever, aren't you?  We have somehow forgotten that patience is a virtue, that good things come to those who wait.  I see this all the time with my students.  They ask a question and expect an immediate answer, having absolutely no patience to discover a solution.  I see it with myself, waiting at a traffic light or waiting in line.
The good news is that yoga practice and mini-meditations can help re-adjust your focus and remind you how important it is to slow down.  When you're waiting for a traffic light, instead of worrying about "how long" the light is taking to change so that you can be on your way, you can take the moment (and it usually is around a minute) to focus on breathing deep instead of focusing on how you're being held-up on your errand, your commute to work, or your after school carpool shuffling.  When you're breathing deep, your breath is automatically lengthened, giving you time to think of a simple mantra as you inhale and repeat it again as you exhale.  Breathing deep gives you time to stop and actually smell the roses (and maybe, you'll make the time to watch them bloom in your garden!)
In the garden, things aren't in a hurry to happen all at once.  They take their time, and little by little, they gradually share their beauty with us.  It's not something you can rush, and sadly, if you're always so busy, you might not have the chance to see it happen.  Take some time, breathe deeply, and appreciate the times that you're forced to wait.  Maybe you'll catch a bloom in action.
I hope I slow down enough to catch this rose as it blooms!
Live slowly - "All mankind's troubles are caused by one single thing, which is their inability to sit quietly in a room." - Blaise Pascal

Wednesday, June 6, 2012

You can take the girl outta Jersey...

...so goes the saying.
Many (more than is decent to admit) moons ago, I was born in the bustling metropolis of Pittsburgh, PA, fairly accounting for my loyalty to the Steelers.  I'm no bandwagoner!  Black and Gold are in my blood, y'ins.

Through a series of events, some fortunate, some unfortunate, my family moved to the decidedly bucolic land of South Jersey.  Not the fabled shore points (Cape May, Atlantic City, etc) of everyone's summer vacations, mind you.  No, the flat, rural farmland of Salem County.  Case in point:  I think two blocks west of my parents' home is the "center" of town - pretty much the only proper traffic light in town (all the others are blinking reds and yellows), and two blocks east of their home lie bonafide farm fields.  Some of our neighbors had horses as their family pets.  Fast forward many years, and I now live in an UNbucolic suburb of NYC.  In fact, if I wanted to drive to the nearest farm, it would be several towns away, not several blocks, and it would probably be to the Bedford "farms" that belong to Martha Stewart and Ralph Lauren - hardly the moguls one brings to mind when you mention "farmer".

Anyway, waaay back in Februrary, taking advantage of a President's Day Monday-off, Husband decided it would be a fun and cultural thing to tour a farm (this, after watching Anthony Bourdain tour a farm in his homestate of New Jersey).  Being a Jersey girl myself, I was game.  We drove about two hours (accounting for George Washington Bridge traffic - you'd think for the guy's birthday they'd let up on the traffic a bit) west and south to the Bobolink dairy farm for a tour of the place by it's owner, a modern-day cheese maker.

It was strange how "at home" I felt.  Sure, I'm a city slicker now, and I'm not about to sell everything and become a cheese farmer, but it was fascinating to learn about the way this husband and wife run a biodynamic farm.  They keep bulls and cows, preferring to keep their farm populated the "natural" way - so much so that they rotate the bulls with other dairies to prevent too much inbreeding.  Everyone is grass-fed, and all of the milk is used to make cheese, save for a small amount that the farmers themselves drink.  They keep chickens, not for laying (although the small amount of eggs they yield are the freshest, most delicious you could get), but for assisting the process of fertilizing.

Snooki and GTL jokes aside, there are some pretty cool places in the Garden State - I mean places that helped ole' Jersey earn that license-plate nickname.  It's inspiring and somewhat comforting when you see people treating the Earth well and acting as good stewards of the Biosphere.  And getting in touch with nature isn't just for us farm-raised South Jersey girls...anyone could come to love it!  Sometimes I'm glad that you can't take the Jersey out of me.

*sometimes*


Tuesday, June 5, 2012

Detox through asana

The purpose of asana is to achieve Samadhi - "enlightenment".  You're putting your body through the paces...pushing its limits...in the hopes of reaching some higher state.  This higher state is very dependent on where you are in your yoga practice.  For some, Samadhi means being unified in body, mind, and spirit. For others, they become intricately in tune with a cosmic consciousness.  Others claim oneness with the Divine.  Some just say they end up feeling comfortably "at home" in their natural state.  It doesn't matter what Samadhi IS for you; to each his/her own enlightenment.

Building on my post from yesterday, detoxing can help you get rid of what's bogging you down and keeping you from your Samadhi.  A clear body leads to a clear mind, which leads to a clear conscientious.  What better way to experience the world?  I ended yesterday's post by touching on the idea that detoxing can be accomplished through asana - a concept that I read about in Yoga Journal - so I thought I'd offer up some postures to get you started:

Cobra pose bhujangasana.  This is a great heart-opening posture that allows you to lengthen the front body.  It also stimulates your adrenal glands, situated on top of your kidneys.

Sage twist marichyasana.  This lovely pose feels fantastic at the end of a long day.  It stretches your shoulders and spine.  It also relieves tension by wringing out your kidneys and liver!

Wheel urdhva dhanurasana. This pose works on the ground just as well as it works up in the air, so if you don't yet have wheel in your practice, a gentle, regular bow (dhanurasana) will give the same results:  Opened heart and hips, and a nicely detoxed liver.

Wide-legged Forward Bend upavistha konasana.  This posture not only stretches the hips and pelvic organs, it induces calm at the end of the day and relaxes you to aid elimination, as well.

So go ahead and get rid of that toxic sludge that's residing in your organs - give 'em a quick wring out (it might be a good idea to drink a full glass of room-temperature water after practice to help flush things along), and you may find yourself a little closer to finding enlightenment, or at least ending your day on a positive note!

"when your mind is clear, pure, and untainted by judgments, you see things as they really are - an equal and balanced way of thinking." - Liz Lark. 1,001 Pearls of Yoga Wisdom. pg 359.

Monday, June 4, 2012

Cleansing

Well, after a heavy, philosophical post yesterday, I figured I might follow it with one that was a little more superficial.  Yes, that's a little contradictory - in fact, my claims at searching "Santosha" are themselves contradictory as anyone who knows my shopping habits can attest.  Suffice it to say, I do admit I've got a lot of things to get in check if I'm going to be honest in my yogic lifestyle.
This spring, "Cleansing" was everywhere, most likely in an attempt to get everyone "bikini body" ready.  Try the Blueprint Cleanse - you'll drop 10 pounds in 15 days.  Try the Master Cleanse - 5 pounds in 5 days.  The GOOP cleanse - you'll look just like Gwyneth did at the Oscars!  Well, I attempted the Zrii detox.  And it got me absolutely NO results.  Wish Santosha was on my radar back then - I would have been content and satisfied with my jiggly thighs and soft tummy.  Alas, I am human, and like all humans, I struggle with finding contentment and satisfaction.
I digress.  The Zrii cleanse is promoted by the Chopra Center (the DEEPAK Chopra Center), which is where I first learned about it.  The Center was offering a 7 day Zrii detox kit to kick off the spring and rid your body of accumulated toxins, excess fluid, and in the process, you "might" lose a few pounds (like 7-10!), but "we're not promising anything".
Good thing they didn't, because I didn't lose 7 pounds.  I gained 5.  On top of the 5 I had gained over the winter.  Yeah, I'm not really at my fighting weight, and my recent addiction to Liquorice Allsorts (I know, strange...but they're surprisingly yummy! Creamy, coconut-y, anise-y.  I somehow got hooked.) isn't helping.  I did the detox over the Easter break, for the most part because the literature accompanying the kit mentioned it was best to be free from distractions and have easy access to the bathroom (Hey, that sounds promising - really getting rid of that toxic stuff, eh?).  What they weren't counting on was my easy access to Coconut M&Ms and Cadbury mini eggs.
I started each day by taking 3 capsules of some greenish brown herbal blend.  15 minutes after that, I was to drink something reminiscent of old-school Metamucil (a greenish powder which was stirred into 8 oz of water) AND drink a full tablespoon of Zrii "CitrusCleansing Oil".  I gagged.  I gagged every single time I had to swallow that tablespoon, so I reduced it to half a tablespoon, and eventually eliminated it.  Well, maybe that oil was essential to the cleanse and that's why I gained weight instead of losing.
What really happened is that I wasn't being mindful - haven't been mindful - and that's what balancing your weight (and LIFE!) is about.  Being mindful about what I'm eating, when I'm eating it, and how I'm eating is a lifestyle change.  That kind of change is the one that gets results - not some quick fix 5 to 7 day detoxing cleanse with crazy ingredients that supposedly "stoke the inner fire" and increase your metabolism to lose weight.  What you're inevitably losing is water weight - which you will gain back when the cleanse is done, unless you use the cleanse to jumpstart your LIFESTYLE change.
In the meantime, if you're feeling clogged with toxins and would like to rid your body of the "ick" that's in there, try cleansing through asana.  Simple spinal twists wring out the kidneys and liver - your "built-in" detoxifiers.  Gentle backbends offer the same benefits.  Add these postures to your lifestyle changes, and you'll lose the weight AND actually detox!
Thanks for reading....more to follow!

Sunday, June 3, 2012

In search of Contentment

Hello, dear readers!  I have been quite a bit busy lately...that's what working, having kids, and living a life does to you.  I have not forgotten about my blog, merely set it aside for a while.  I thought about blogging quite a bit - I've had many experiences over the last 3 months where I've said "Oh, this is a great topic for my blog!", but finding the time to sit down and compose an entry, add pictures and links to make it interesting, and telling people about it is the challenge.  Anyway, it's been busy around here in YATS-landia and I feel like I've been running 90 miles an hour with no relief in sight.  When I think one task or commitment is finished, there's another one waiting in the wings, ready to swoop in and ensure that my life isn't slowing down.  I welcome summer more than ever this year.  It will give me time to get back to my yoga practice, dive into my yoga reading list (I hope to have some good book reviews!), and most importantly, back to blogging!

I have been contemplating a big step in my yoga practice, and to ready myself, I have been skimming through lots of different material.  Lately, one theme has been coming to the forefront of my mind, probably because things seem more stressful than ever, and I'm looking for ways to slow down, enjoy life, be grateful for what life I have created, and honor the best intentions.  One of Patanjali's yamas (restraint) comes close to defining this:  Asteya - which translates to "non stealing"; however, this goes far beyond the literal translation, which reminds one of God's commandments to Moses "Thou shalt not steal."  Asteya means not coveting, not hoarding, not getting in the way of others' happiness.  Patanjali's second niyama (observance) seems more appropriate:  Santosha.

Santosha is the sanskrit word you see above, which translates to "contentment and satisfaction" - more as a theme for living your life, rather than a temporary state of being.  I can eat an amazing meal and feel contentment and satisfaction, but not experience Santosha.  It is a state of mind - one that goes deep - and one that is oftentimes hard to observe.  This is why yoga is a "practice" - one that never ends.

Santosha is about living in the present - not daydreaming of the future or wishing for what you don't have. It is not necessarily about not having goals, but it means accepting things as they come to you, good or bad, and being genuinely happy for others when good things happen to them.  For me, this has always been very, very hard.  I'm the oldest of 4 children, and my parents didn't have the means to give us all of the things that our friends had - or all of the things we wanted.  I remedied this by getting a job, babysitting, and working my butt off so that I could buy the things that kept me in pace with my friends - but in the early '90s, I wasn't always satisfied - plus, all that working meant I missed out on a lot of going out.  Bottom line:  I had a BAD case of "keeping up with the Joneses".

It hasn't gotten easier as I've gotten older.  I still work my butt off, but I don't exactly have a high-powered career that affords me big bonuses and lots of vacations.  We don't have an dynamic house with fabulous furnishings and amazing architecture.  My yard isn't the best-manicured on the block (not even close, thanks to the large tree we recently had to cut down!).  It sounds like I'm crapping all over my life and lamenting that I'm not "good enough"...and that's absolutely not my intention.  What I'm driving at is "Santosha" - feeling satisfaction with what I have and not getting in the way of others' happiness.  I'm not giving up my "drive" or my goals - but I do have to practice being happy for others who are blessed.  When a friend gets a promotion, instead of asking "Hey, why aren't I getting promoted?" it's time to be happy for the friend and be content in knowing that when the time is right for me, I'll get promoted, too.  Or not.  When someone I know experiences joy or happiness in his/her life, it's not time to question where my joy is; it's time to honor the fact that someone has found happiness, and hope that one day, they will be feeling the same for me.  Or not.
Santosha is a way of reminding myself that with or without these "trappings of success", I am worthy, I am capable of satisfaction, and it's up to me to find and see that contentment.  Being content is not about "things" and "experiences", which is hard to keep in mind in our American society which is competitive and materialistic.  Santosha brings it back to the basics - "Honor the good in yourself, honor the good in others".
Thanks for reading and joining me on my yogic journey.  More is on the horizon...

"May all beings, everywhere, be happy and free.  And may the thoughts and actions of my own life contribute, in some way, to that happiness and to that freedom" - Swami Nirmalananda