And back to our regularly scheduled program...

For many of us in the Northeast, today we are coming off of a week-long school vacation, typically known as "Mud Week".  Lots of folks leave town in search of warmer climes.  Lots of other folks leave town in search of fresh powder for downhill skiing.  And still lots of people (like me!) stick around in search of the chance to recuperate from the busy-ness of a daily routine. (but then end up catching up with all of your friends and late bedtimes ensue, resulting in even less recuperation and more need for it!)

It was a good break.  We did a little Skiing, a little skating, a little hair-cutting, a fair amount of staying up past bedtime, and a LOT of yoga.  When I look at my class log, it's starting to seem as though I might finish all of the required classes some day;  I'm making progress...

However, with just 2 1/2 months left in my training program, there are some mixed feelings coming to the surface.  There's the feeling of accomplishment, that this journey is coming to a crossroads.  I don't want to say "ending", because if there's one thing I can take away from this entire process, it's that the journey is never complete.  We are just approaching a new path on the journey, and it's up to me to make a decision on how to continue.  One thing is certain, and that's that I've grown and experienced so much more than I ever could have imagined when I began the teacher training.

There is also a feeling of sadness that this part of the journey is ending, though.  My weekly routine of going to "Yoga School" is going to change.  One of these days I'm going to be finished with all of my reading and writing "assignments".  I'll be able to go back to reading for pleasure.  That's not to say that I don't enjoy what I'm reading...but it's just not as pleasurable when you have to get through so many pages by a certain date.  Then there's the writing - I haven't written a book report in years, and I'm faced with the prospect of writing not one, but THREE of them in the next two and half months (and this means I have to read the books that go with them.  These are not your Grisham quick-reads, either.  They're heavy-duty yoga philosophy texts).  I'll be relieved when they are done, but I think I might actually miss the presence of an assignment to do.

Finally, there's the feeling of fear - fearing the unknown, and what's "next".  How do I market myself as a yoga instructor?  Do I even want to take that step?  If I get a job, how is this new pattern going to affect my "free time"?  Will people even like taking class from me?  There's a lot of unknown out there...

I suppose it's time to apply what I've learned from all this reading, and that's to remember to be here now.  Be present.  What's finished is past and what will be is not a certainty.  The only thing is to take each moment as it comes (remembering to fully appreciate each moment as a gift!), and b-r-e-a-t-h-e.
...and now back to our regularly scheduled Monday...

What is all this Universe, this life, birth, death?  What is the purpose of all this?  What is at the bottom of all this?  What is the goal of all these activities?  Remain in these questions for as long as you can, remain longer and longer, you will know the Truth...which state is the natural desire of everybody in unclouded moments. - Shivapuri Baba