Mudras

It's okay.  It's Jnana mudra!

I have been doing a lot of yoga lately.  I haven't been practicing asana everyday, but pretty darn close.  As you regular readers know, I have to be a student in 52 yoga classes and an observer in 8 yoga classes by the end of my teacher training (it ends in APRIL, people.  4 short months away!  Oh I have so much to do before then...) and I have crammed in about 8 classes since December 17th...and I have big plans to do "Hangover Yoga" tomorrow.  Should be interesting...
I have also been caught practicing a Yama or two lately (ha ha....I'm observing one per week), in between learning about the chakras, some anatomy, and thinking about creating class outlines.  My brain has been scattered all over the Yoga "Map", as it seems, and I don't think my asana has been as "spot-on" as it usually is.  Perhaps studying the proper alignment for postures has made my foundation a little less confident, perhaps I've just been too tired to focus on my poses, perhaps I've had a bit too much wine this holiday season (ahem.  maybe I should just go with the last one and call it a day).  Whatever the reason, I've felt the need to find something to help me ground my practice and get the poses bit more on target.  I've found that Mudras can help!
Mudra is a Sanskrit word that means "seal", and mudras are simple hand gestures that convey messages or a focus within your practice (no, I'm not talking about THOSE types of hand gestures!).  As part of our teacher training, we are expected to know ONE mudra.  I know that "one" doesn't seem like a whole lot, but there's a lot of other stuff we need to know, including entire phrases in Sanskrit, so cut us some slack.  Mudras are often visible in Hindu statues and icons, and the position of the statue's hands convey great meaning.
Anjali mudra (hands held in prayer with thumbs resting together on the sternum/breastbone) is commonly used during practice, so I already "know" a mudra, but me being me, I'd like to know more than one.  Some mudras are quite challenging to form with the fingers.  I personally have a hard time with Vishnu mudra, where the first and middle fingers bend forward, while the ring and pinkie fingers remain flexed and the thumb rests alongside the fist.  Basically, I can't straighten my ring finger in this position; it's really uncomfortable for me.  One mudra that I have come to appreciate, however, is Jnana mudra, or as people in the western hemisphere might say, "the OK sign!".  This is a simple and comfortable mudra, but it also has a wonderful meaning for your yoga practice.
The Jnana mudra is often seen when a figure is sitting in a comfortable cross-legged position, and the hands are making the "OK sign" with the backs of the hands resting easily on the knees.  Each finger has a meaning, and the position of the fingers has a great deal of symbolism for this mudra (and your yoga practice).  The thumb represents the energy of the universe, and the index finger represents your true "Self".  By bringing your thumb and index finger to touch, you are bringing together your self with the universe, effectively uniting them (the ultimate expression of Raja yoga).  The remaining three fingers represent the "Ego" (middle finger - rather telling, don't you think, when flipping someone the bird?), the "Mind" (ring finger), and "Worldly goods" (the pinkie).  By opening these fingers and resting the hands on the knees, we allow these aspects of ourselves to drip away from our practice, to drip away from our true selves and the energy of the universe.  No one needs an ego on the mat, you can forget about the mind because your body will guide you - you just have to listen to it!, and worldly goods are of no use to you when you're practicing asana.
So, as 2013 approaches, with it's first 4 months filled with "yoga everything" for me, Jnana mudra will be a wonderful symbol to come back to.  I can allow it to guide my teacher training - I'll find the energy to finish, I'll let my ego get out of the way, I'll try to forget about worldly goods (I really DO have plenty), and I've already lost my mind, so I won't miss it!

Happy New Year!  May 2013 find you joyfully on your mat!  Thanks for reading! - Megan

Satya

 Satya.  Truth.  A common interpretation of Satya is "The Truth that equals Love."  In his Yoga Sutras, Patanjali says "When one is firmly established in speaking the truth, the fruits of action become subservient to him." (Sutra 2.36).  This week, as I contemplate the second of Patanjali's Yamas, I find myself somewhat confused.  Not because I don't know what truth is...it's not-lying, right?  I perceive myself as an honest person...I'm not generally in the habit of lying, which is not to say that I have never lied...it's just that I don't do it often, and when I do happen to lie, I think it is with good reason.  But what is "with good reason" for me, is not always "with good reason" for someone else.

Perhaps an example will clarify.  Last week, I was practicing Ahimsa, or non-harming, which sort of means following a vegan diet (you know, non-harming the animals and all).  I wasn't strict about the veganism (hey, I'm being truthful!), but I did observe a vegetarian diet for the week.  In fact, until Christmas eve's Feast of the Seven Fishes, I was doing okay, but, I was technically on to Satya by that time, so eating a bit of meat wasn't the end of the world.  At said Feast, my friend's mother in law mentioned that they "don't ever eat meat on Christmas eve" as she tucked into the very, very delicious seafood salad. I did my very best to bite my tongue and not mention that, "Uhm, that seafood salad you're heaping on your plate is loaded with meat..."  I wasn't being untruthful - she knew what she was doing...I just didn't want to mince words over her definition of "meat" versus mine (and the rest of the known universe).  Earlier in the week, I made vegetarian chili using "Quorn" (a mushroom-based meat substitute, and quite delicious), and I urged my children to eat their "meat".  I also made a "BLT" using smoky-maple flavored tempeh.  I gave half to my husband and told him it was a BLT.  He wasn't fooled, and even enjoyed it, but I didn't give up the gig until after he'd had a bite and inquired, "Uhm, where's the bacon?"
So what is truth?  Is it conditional?  Are there degrees of truthfulness?  Are there times when it's appropriate to be untruthful?  I'm going to propose "Yes" to all three, even if I may be betraying the intent of Patanjali.  If I never experience Samadhi, I'll know it could be because of my lack of truth.

As I ponder my willingness to say it's conditional, it comes in degrees, and there are times when it's appropriate to be untruthful, it begs me to ask:  Is it okay to be untruthful as long as "no one gets hurt"?
On Christmas eve, I think it was appropriate to bite my tongue about the seafood not being "meat. The mood was merry and bright, and if I brought up the fact that my friend's MIL was wrong, it would have made her feel defensive, put a cloud over her meal (and probably everyone else's), and after all, it isn't the end of the world that she thought seafood wasn't meat.  This way, everyone stayed happy, unharmed.  If I had brought up the truth, not only would I have been perceived as being obnoxious (which I'd like to think is NOT my true nature!), I am sure that more than a few people would have been unhappy.

Now, I'm not going to go around, living my life, wondering if in each situation it's okay to get away with a lie or being untruthful.  Like I said before, I'm not in the habit of lying for lying's sake.  What I am saying is that in certain situations, a lie may not be the worst thing.  Am I "lying, with love"?  I think we have all experienced that.  When an acquaintance asks your opinion, sometimes it's easier to be complimentary rather than truthful.  When you're trying to get your kids (and husband!) to eat healthier, a little untruthfulness may not be the worst thing.  I can justify this as a version of the truth that equals love.  Can't I?


This above all; to thine own self be true.
And it must follow, as the night the day,
Thou canst not then be false to any man  - W.Shakespeare, Hamlet Act 1, scene 3

Ahimsa (part deux)

So here it is, my week on "Ahimsa".  The week where I am charged with practicing non-violence.  I suppose that means I should get this damned tune out of my head:

Kiss with a Fist

So Florence claims that the tune is not about domestic violence...but rather about people in love who push one another to psychological extremes.  Well, Ahimsa actually speaks more to that than actual kicking, slapping, stomping, smashing violence, I think.

Either way, it's a great song.  Too bad I shouldn't be aurally indulging myself with it for a week.

Ahimsa pratisthayam tat samnidhau vaira tyagah (in the presence of one firmly established in non-violence, all hostilities cease.) - Patanjali's Yoga Sutras 2.35

Facing the Octopus

Patanjali "wrote the book on Yoga".  Let me clarify: Patanjali was not the first guy to write about Yoga - he certainly was not the last - he writes that he is merely "continuing the teachings of yoga", teachings that have been around for centuries millenia. In fact, most yogic scholars aren't even sure that Patanjali was one person; they believe Patanjali is the nom de plume of a collection of authors on the subject of what yoga is.  Nonetheless, "Patanjali's" Yoga Sutras are the go-to texts for serious students of yoga, and it features heavily on our reading list for teacher training.

Patanjali was a proponent of Raja (or Royal) Yoga - and developed "Ashtanga", or an 8-limbed path one must follow in order to practice Raja Yoga.  *I particularly like the image I found for Patanjali - a many-snake-headed figure...perhaps alluding to the many authors contributing to the Sutras?  Perhaps symbolizing the main idea of the Sutras - the 8-limbed path known as Ashtanga. In reality, he is associated with being lord of serpents (the many heads mean "omnipresence"...you can read more about Patanjali here). Either way, this path is something to be reckoned with, and we need to "reckon" with it for the next 2 months.

The 8 paths are as follows:  Yamas, Niyamas, Asana, Pranayama, Pratyahara, Dharana, Dhyana, & Samadhi.  The first 5 limbs are to be practiced and worked-on simultaneously as you approach the last 3 limbs, which are attained sequentially.  One must first practice Dharana (concentration) to reach Dhyana (meditations) and ultimately achieve Samadhi (union with the universe, complete understanding of peace, love, truth, etc).

Most people are familiar with Asana (the yoga postures) and Pranayama (mindful breathing, control of the life force) from their time in a yoga class.  Instructors of some classes even discuss Pratyahara (turning inward), when they encourage you to focus your attention on your own mat, your own practice.  The Yamas and Niyamas - there are 5 of each - are relatively novel, which is surprising considering they are rather significant to the 8-limbed path!
In our teacher training, we will spend the next 10 weeks focusing on the Yamas and Niyamas, practicing them with intent. We will be demonstrating Dharana - concentrating - on one Yama or Niyama each week.  The first 5 weeks will be spent on the Yamas.  The next 5 weeks will be the Niyamas.  By the end of the 10 weeks, we will for sure know the names and meanings of all the Yamas and Niyamas, but we will ultimately learn a lot more about ourselves in the process.
First up?  the first Yama - Ahimsa, which I've written about before.  It is attributed to "Non-violence".  Considering we are in the throes of holiday season fever, this will be an apropos time to study some "non-violence."  I'll keep you posted...

"Practice becomes firmly established when it has been cultivated uninterruptedly and with devotion over a prolonged period of time" - Patanjali's Yoga Sutras I.14

Finding a Guinea Pig

Wow.  I should be ashamed of myself for telling people I write a blog.  While I really need to work on posting more regularly, I also have to cut myself some slack because I have been up to all things "Yoga", from doing my reading assignments, attending classes, writing papers, and thinking about blogging.  Things do inspire me, but sometimes when it comes down to sitting and blogging about it, it's hard to get to it.  You know, inspiration often strikes at times when it is inconvenient to blog.

Yesterday, as part of the teacher training program, we had one of our monthly, intensive 6-hour classes. I was so happy to be there, but there's a LOT of information that gets disseminated to you in 6 hours, and it takes a bit to process.  We had a 2 1/2 hour session on History and Philosophy, and while the texts are a lot to digest, I'm excited about an assignment coming up in a few short weeks where we need to intensively study the Yamas and Niyamas.  There are 10 of them, and each week we will be bringing our awareness to one of the principles, attempting to observe them in our interactions and reflect on how we react to that.  I am willing to bet there will be plenty of material to blog about!

The rest of our class was devoted to teaching postures.  We talked in our large group about the instruction necessary to get our students into the postures; what wording is effective, how to enter the posture, how to ensure proper alignment in the posture, and how to exit the posture.  We talked about what postures might work before and what postures might work after.  There's a lot to mix and match, as I'm sure you can imagine!  Then, we broke out into small groups where we taught one another short sequences.

Just a few weeks ago, this "instructing" was a totally overwhelming thing to do, but now we are starting to become a little more comfortable with directing a person into a posture.  The only problem is that the people we are instructing are yogis.  Not only are they yogis, they are people who have near-perfect alignment.  They are gals who do yoga allthetime.  Many have been doing yoga for years.  They don't really "need" the instruction.  You can just say "Down Dog", and they know what to do, self-correcting, making adjustments until the form is perfect while you just stand there and watch.

No, what we need are Guinea Pigs - and Betsy told us so:  "Go out there and find yourself a guinea pig".  We need to find people who do NOT do yoga on a regular basis, people who might not have an extensive background in practice,  so we are forced to find the words that will guide someone properly into alignment.  So where do you find a Guinea Pig?  I started out several weeks ago, actually, trying this with my husband in our family room.  Let's just say that it ended poorly.  I said "tuck your toes", and he said "What?  I don't know what you're saying!" and I said, "Tuck your toes.  How can you not know how to tuck your toes?", and he said some more stuff, and I yelled said some other stuff, and, well, you can only imagine how bad it was.  Now what?

Luckily, I am not so easily deterred.  Even more fortuitous is that my husband is rather forgiving and willing to give it another go.  I wrote out a short 20 minute practice (incorporating some of the postures we've been working on in teacher training), and tonight he was my student.  I had a proper warm-up, some standing postures, a cool down, and a Savasana.  At the end, he said he felt relaxed!  I couldn't believe it!  I actually was able to relax my tense, "annoyed" (he writes his OWN blog about stuff that annoys him.  Which is pretty much everything.  I would give you a link, but a.) you probably do something that annoys him and he's already blogged about it; and b.) his blog gets way more traffic than my blog does, so I don't need to send my readers his way; c.) you might like his blog better and stop reading mine, especially since he posts more than once a month; and d.) he drops the f-bomb a LOT) Husband!!

Have I found my guinea pig?  While this was a much better start, I think I must continue my search.  I should add to my flock herd (I looked that up, a group of guinea pigs really is called a herd!) of willing participants
while I hone and refine my teaching skill.  Look out.
Just for now, allow a wave of breath to enliven your experience... Drink in the possibility of being who and what you really are - Danna Faulds

A lot can happen in a week, especially when not much "happens".  We live in an area that has been hit hard by Hurricane Sandy.  I went back and re-read my last blog post and so many things about it seem frivolous in light of the week we all just experienced.  Who cares about yoga pants, board games, and foot massages when homes are destroyed, lives are lost, and productivity grinds to a halt.  Yes, I was advocating "slowing it down", but I didn't mean for it to STOP.  My usual productivity stopped, so not much "happened", but I feel like so much is different this week from my Pollyanna attitude of last week.

One of many fallen trees has ripped down
power lines, blocked sidewalk,
obstructed road

Yes, a lot happened.  This is the first time I've sat in front of a computer in a week.  All of my "news" has been local - obtained from the Facebook feed on my phone.  Yes, I know, first world problems, but I truthfully kept it all in perspective, and didn't complain - or at least tried not to.  I was "inconvenienced" by Hurricane Sandy. Our house came away relatively unscathed.  A few branches fell, our home had no structural damage (as we have been able yet to determine), and we have a gas hot water heater with a gas pilot.  While we lost electricity, we had hot water at home and could shower.  A mere block away, families lost half of their homes because massive trees fell and crushed them.  Given that, I'd say me without a computer is a mere inconvenience.

We had lots of candles on-hand, so dinnertime was "romantic".  Well, those dinners we actually ate at home were candle-lit, because we were so fortunate to have wonderful friends who opened their homes to us for meals, device-charging, and warmth.  We only ate evening meals at our house twice throughout the 5 days we were without power.  One friend lent us a camping lantern, and that's when my "pioneering" instincts kicked in.  On our walks home, I would tell the boys to gather downed sticks and branches for fireplace kindling.  My husband, who never camped a day in his life (putting up a tent in February with your fraternity brothers, building a huge bonfire, and getting completely drunk until you pass out in front of said fire doesn't count as "camping") wondered, "What the heck is that crazy broad up to now?"  We used matches to light the burners on our gas stove so we could cook up food before it went bad.  Luckily, our fridge wasn't overflowing with food, so this was manageable.  We monitored the freezer contents, and as something thawed out on it's own, we figured out what we could make with it, and ate it.  If someone invited us for dinner, we brought whatever was thawed.  It was turkey burgers one night, beef another night, shrimp a third night - we didn't fare too badly.  We also have eaten more meat than I've eaten in many weeks, so I feel like I've actually been overindulgent.  Let's not even mention the mounds of Hallowe'en candy I've eaten.

A home (and 2 cars) crushed by fallen trees.

So, within a week, my mindset has completely shifted.  Instead of wondering how many emails I'll send in a day, when I'll be able to browse the internet for more yoga pants, when I'll be able to hit the gym, what night I'll be able to catch up on my DVR, I needed to wonder about other things.  With electricity removed from my life, I had to wonder about how long I could go without doing laundry and how I could work out the logistics once it was time to do laundry.  I had to plan out when and what path to walk home from friends' houses because without streetlights to guide us, it was really unsafe.  There was no "work" for a week, but before people think it was a vacation, it was anything BUT.  I may not have created lessons, graded papers, or interacted with students, but I certainly worked: keeping in touch with friends via text messages, updating my family who were unable to reach us by landline, reading info feeds on Facebook that reported news of damage cleanup around our area, not to mention the fact that everything takes twice as long when you don't have electricity.  By the end of the day, I was more exhausted than I usually am after a full day of work.  I'm sure the emotional toll had an effect, but I slept soundly for 8 hours a night (maybe it was SO cold in our house that my body went into hibernation mode.)

In the past week, you could say "nothing happened" in the sense that I wasn't productive my usual way, but a lot happened, including surviving a hurricane and changing my perspective.  I'm so grateful for the small losses we had to help us notice and appreciate the bigger picture.

Thank you for reading.
Namaste. 

Slow it down

It's been a busy couple of days...and so I haven't had the chance to blog lately.  Not that I haven't had the desire to!  I bought some new yoga pants and wanted to blog about that, I bought a new book and wanted to blog about that, I took a challenging class that ended with a crazy posture (thanks, Kate!) and wanted to blog about that, I taught a yoga class to colleagues at work and wanted to blog about that...  But it hasn't been until life has forced me to slow it down a bit that I actually had the time/courage/motivation to sit and put my thoughts down on paper computer screen.

Yes, I, like much of the Northeast corridor, have been crippled a bit, thanks to Hurricane Sandy.  Schools are closed, trains aren't running, flooding and mass power-loss are expected.  It's different from a Nor'easter snow storm, because there is no snow to shovel (although I am compelled to report that I heard someone outside with a leaf-blower yesterday evening.  I know you're all with me here: THAT is ridiculous.)  We are collectively being forced to "take a break", but it's an odd break to take, because I'm sure the sympathetic nervous system is still being stressed out.  With every powerful gust of wind threatening to down a tree limb or two, and every news channel urging people to stay indoors (and what about those poor weather reporters being drenched as they report alongside the swelling tides of the Jersey shore?), I'm sure few people are not feeling the stress and blood pressure spike.  As far as your nervous system is concerned, however, it's time to pause, take stock of things, realize that the weather is out of human control, and slow things down.

So, how will you spend this time?  We had the chance to sleep in today (usually early morning is my only time to squeeze in a workout - hitting an early yoga class or scooting out to the gym - but naturally,those places are all closed), and then fixed the children a leisurely breakfast.  I had the kids do their Italian homework while I cleaned up breakfast, then get caught up on cello practice (hey, we're raising a couple of renaissance men!) while I caught up on ironing.  Husband joined in on guitar and it became a regular jam session.  The boys moved on to coloring with markers, I threw in a load of laundry (in case we lose power I'd like a head start on stinky clothes piling up), and Husband busied himself with booking his travel for work next week.

Now that the "hard stuff" is out of the way, and it's not even noon, what will we do with ourselves?  I lit a sage smudge stick and threw it in the fireplace - an unconventional riff on home scent, but I'm saving my candles in case the power does go out.  At least the air will be clear (the traditional purpose of a sage smudge stick is to "clear the air").  We'll likely break out a few board games later on, and maybe get around to finally treating the boys to a screening of "Back to the Future".  A few mugs of tea are in order, maybe a foot massage.  All of those little luxuries that we don't often take.

Why have we created this society where things like this are "luxuries"?  Why do we feel like we aren't successful unless we're "busy" all the time?  More than I'd like to admit, I've lately found myself responding to the question "Hey, how are you?" with an exhausted-sounding "BUSY!"  Do we busy ourselves all the time to feel important?  Are we being busy all the time to keep pace with our peers?  I have to wonder why we have created this life for ourselves where there is always so much to do.
Yes, I'm stressed about the potential damage from this storm.   Yes, I'm worried for my friends, family, and neighbors, and praying for their collective peace and safety.  But I'm also grateful for the storm for forcing me to slow down, take stock of what's important, and get on with it.  So, slow it down, and see if you can't find some bits of enjoyment for yourself in the midst of the storm.

Try a semi-inverted pose to restore your body's essential systems in times of stress.  Lie on the floor with your legs supported on the seat of a chair.  Place your palms on your lower belly feeling it rise and fall with your breath until you feel at rest.

"Book" Review: Women's Health Ultimate Yoga Guide

While recently shopping at the grocery store (of all places!), I happened to walk down the aisle that sells books and magazines. I love a good trashy mag now and then - you know, the ones that love to scream "Kate's pregnant!  It's Twins!!"...and when you turn to the article on the inside, hoping to sneak a peek of her baby bump, they explain how an "inside source" heard the Duchess mumble something about the Olsen twins' latest clothing line after a pregnant pause in the conversation.  Anyway, while perusing the offerings, my eye spied this magazine!

Women's Health Ultimate Yoga Guide is actually a Special Issue - free of advertisements (hence the shocking cover price of $9.99) and full of helpful yoga tips.  BTW, I consider Women's Health to be only slightly above the "trashy magazine" designation.  "Boost your Sex Life with Yoga!"?!?  Uhm...

The Book-a-zine is divided into 5 Parts, a few chapters in each.  Part 1 discusses Yoga Basics - where to begin if you are new to yoga, what is the best style of yoga for you, and how to start a home practice.  One of the more helpful chapters, (Chapter 2:  Breakthrough Poses), features Seane Corn outlining proper alignment for 3 key yoga postures that will take your practice to the next level.  I found her descriptions helpful - especially since I need to know these postures inside and out as a fledgling yoga teacher.

Part 2 is "Bend for your Best Body", and features sequences designed to target your trouble areas.  Celebrity instructor Tara Stiles creates a sequence to sculpt a "leaner, hotter body", Lara Rosenbaum helps whittle your middle, and Kristen Dollard suggests practices to increase flexibility.  The chapter ends with some quick (15 minute) sequences you can do when pressed for time.  Something is better than nothing!

Part 3 is "Strength in a Pose", and the various chapters give guidance on postures to target specific goals.  If you are a weight lifter, certain yoga postures can increase your range of motion, as stiffness can result as your muscles tighten and strengthen.  Certain postures can help stretch you out after a run, and dare I say, improve your performance.  There is a chapter on demystifying and conquering uber-challenging postures (HANDstand, anyone?).

Part 4 is "Bliss Out", which taps into the benefits of the breathwork you'll be doing on your mat.  It addresses the stress-reducing aspects that a regular yoga practice brings.  Part 5 is the shortest section, entitled "Light Bites", and gives recipes for healthier fare.  Their term is "Slim, Calm, Sexy Food".  Uhm...

Pros:  I like the fact that Women's Health has consulted with actual yoga instructors to provide the "meat and potatoes" of the yoga postures and mini practices.  They talk about the need to start slowly and work your way up to more challenging postures - basically "build your practice" - and they walk you through it.  There are so few advertisements in the magazine that it does feel like a helpful manual.  I am a food magazine junkie, so the last section of the book is helpful, too.

Cons:  The publication seems to be geared heavily towards single women - but I can always pretend my children and husband don't exist as I work my way through the sequences.  Their insistence of "Frying Fat" on the mat is a bit far-fetched.  I do work up a sweat on occasion, but not on a regular basis.  Maybe I'm taking the wrong kinds of yoga classes (let me clarify for the record that the sweat you work up in Bikram or Hot Yoga comes from the heat in the room, not necessarily from your practice)!  I also take issue with the fact that they don't really offer up enough cautionary advice when it comes to the advanced postures.  King Dancer and Handstand are probably best practiced under the trained eye of a teacher who can support and comment on your alignment, rather than from a picture and one paragraph instruction in a magazine.  Finally, the appearance of the word "Sexy" is almost as frequent as the word "Yoga"...again, probably a testament to the fact that I am not their core audience.  I'm not saying that I don't want to be sexy or am repulsed by it, but it's not what my yoga is for me.  They seem to have forgotten that yoga is for EVERYbody - men, too!  I don't see a guy buying this magazine.

It looks like I have more Cons than Pros, but actually, I think this is a helpful little manual.  It's great for the person woman who doesn't have many books or magazines on yoga, who may be contemplating starting a practice and wants to learn some basics at home before trying out a studio class.  I don't necessarily think you are going to melt fat and sculpt muscle any time soon - those sort of results come with the integration of cardio into many, many years of yoga practice.  I've been practicing for 8 years, and I'd hardly venture to say I'm "sculpted".  I am flexible, and I feel more at ease with myself, and I'm super happy that yoga has offered that to me!

The Women's Health Ultimate Yoga Guide is published by Rodale and is available on newstands until December. ($9.99)

The "Regulars"

I need to take more yoga classes.   In fact, I need to attend 60 classes over the course of my training program (8 classes to observe, 52 to actually practice).  Prior to joining this teacher training program, I did not often practice at the studio where the training takes place.  I did most of my classes at the gym.  At a gym, you have a few "loyal" yogis, but nothing like the regulars you find in a studio class:  yogis who are there week in, week out, who know one another's names, the teacher knows their quirks and preferences, they have their "spots" in the room, their rapport with one another.  When you're not a regular and you "pop in" to the class,  you're not really an interloper (yoga is very embracing), but you might as well be, because you aren't sure where to put your mat, you don't know the next person's name, and you certainly don't get the inside jokes from last week.

I would venture to say that the majority of women in our training cohort are accustomed to taking higher-level yoga classes.  We may frequent a level 1 class, but most of us are probably at home in a level 2...a disciplined few in a level 3.  But when you start out teaching yoga, you don't  launch as a level 2 teacher.  You have to begin with the basics and work your way up, therefore, we are required to take at least half of our 60 classes in a level 1 setting.  We are supposed to pay attention to the language, the postures, the pacing, the modifications.  Yoga is such a discipline that this act of taking level 1 classes is not a "step backwards"...it's not "too easy"  or "too simple". There is always something to learn and observe, and sometimes we do our best observing when we slow things down.

Today, I had to leave work early for an appointment, and I ended up (fortuitously!) with just enough time to squeeze in a Level 1 practice today.  It was listed on the studio schedule as "Extra Gentle".  In the car on the way over to the studio, I wondered who would be taking a yoga class in the middle of the day and I wondered what the pacing for an Extra Gentle class would be like.  I have found that timing is everything when considering who will be in on the mat next to you.  Super-early morning classes (6 am) tend to have mostly women students who are getting a jump start on their day before work.  9/9:30 classes tend to be mostly stay-at-home or work-from-home parents who have time for a yoga class after nursery school drop off or morning carpool routes are finished (again, mostly women).  Afternoon classes have a good mix of college students who are done with classes for the day,  and working people who take a class on their way home from work.  Evening and weekend classes are where you have your best chances of finding men, although still not many, and the classes can range from deep stretching postures to something more athletic that works up the desired sweat.  But who is taking a yoga class right in the middle of the day?  In NYC, probably young professionals on their lunch break.  In the suburbs? It's older ladies - ah ha - the "extra gentle" is starting to make sense.

Since we need to attend so many Level 1 classes, there just so happened to be 4 of our cohort in today's "extra gentle" class...and the rest of the class (the Regulars) had us beat by at least 20 years.  They all knew one another's names, knew one another's "drams", were comfortable offering up advice, lively chatting away in the hallway before class started.  They clearly had their "spots" in class, and some were even a tiny bit fa-tootsed (sp?) by the extra 4 people taking up precious floor space.  They knew whose mat went where, and at one point, there was an unclaimed mat, and it took several minutes of banter to figure out that someone had left the mat from the class before, and it actually belonged to no one (the nerve of someone to take up floor space like that!)

Let's be clear:  I'm not relaying this story out of judgement or condemnation, but more out of mild amusement.  I can clearly see some of their habits becoming annoying over time (yelling out in the middle of the class: "I have no idea what we are doing right now!" and the teacher patiently, gently responding, "We're just lifting our shoulders.  I know you can do that.").  Nevertheless, these were the Regulars of the Thursday midday class, and maybe their instructor sees these quirks as endearing, maybe she embraces the dynamic of the group, which clearly is comforting enough to say what you feel whenever you need to say it.  

It definitely made me wonder what the Regulars of my eventual yoga class will be like.  I'll need to make a lot of professional decisions:  Will I like my class to be more stretching, or more athletic?  What will I do if my regulars start talking to one another in the middle of my instruction?  Will I teach in the mornings, afternoons, or evenings?  How will I begin to captivate a class so that they actually WANT to become my regulars?  I'm going to need to be engaging from the start to build a group as loyal as the one I was part of today.

I am a LONG way from establishing a regular class...but ever the planner, it is something for me to keep stewing on the back burner while I continue my journey.  Every so often, I'll lift the lid of the pot and take a peek, even stir a little, but for now, I think I'd better take a lot more level 1 classes and worry about refining my practice before I start worrying about who I'm going to teach.

Relish the quiet bliss that comes with aging gracefully (and getting on the mat can help with that!)  Yoga is for everyBODY.

Yeah, but does it work?

I haven't blogged in a few days...things get busy around here once school kicks into gear.  Lab reports and tests need to get graded, lessons need to be planned, kids need to be shuffled around to sports and lessons, homework needs to be done.  Now this year I'm adding my own homework, lessons, and classes to the mix.  Suffice it to say, I've been meaning to write, but time is at a premium.

It's a topsy-turvy world I've created this fall.  I was up and out of the house by 5:20am on Friday, just to observe a class and back home in time to get to work early because I was doing a lab with my students that required a bit of prep.  Today, I'm set to take my first all-day teacher training session (Husband is gamely willing to entertain the boys solo today), followed by a Jack White concert at Radio City later tonight.  Whew.  Even still, I feel it's going to be worth it in the end, and I'm enjoying the journey thus far (even if the homework is a bit anxiety-inducing - see previous post).

I was sharing with someone at work that I was going back to school this year to get a new teaching certification, and when I explained that it was for teaching yoga, she raised an eyebrow and said "Oh?"  "Yes...", I continued, "I've been practicing for a long time, and I felt like this was the next step for me to take my practice a little further, a little more serious."  She questioned back, "Yoga, huh?  You don't seem like the type.  I mean, does it even work?"  I didn't even know how to answer that.

First of all, the comment that I didn't seem like the "type"...what's that supposed to mean?  How about Marilyn up there, hands in Anjali Mudra...does she seem like the type?  I mean, she's wearing lipstick and jewels and everything!  Should I start there (I've been known to don a red lip and a few gems now and again)...or am I supposed to drench myself in patchouli and wear tunics, mala beads, and Birkenstocks everywhere?  I know that people make assumptions about "yogis", so I took no offense...I thought it was funny that her first reaction was that I wasn't the type.  

The second query was the one that made me pause:  Does it even work?  Does yoga work for what?  Straighening your hair?  Getting out stains?  Probably not.  The thing about yoga is that everyone has a different reason and intention for coming to the mat, and I would venture to say that it probably does work for whatever intention you set out for yourself.  The biggest thing to realize is that yoga is not a "magic bullet" solution for your problems.  I was scanning my brain about how to explain this for her, but I quickly realized that people can't be made to see this until they are ready to see it.  A yoga practice is something you build over time - nothing happens overnight - and with each session on the mat, be it restorative, iyengar, or vinyasa, you'll have an opportunity to work on your intention.

Is your intention to relax?  True, relaxation can happen in a lavender-scented bubble bath, but yoga can also offer relaxation.  Is your intention to build strength?  Lift some free weights...or do a few planks and down-dogs.  Do you want to restore the flexibility of your youth?  Yoga is one path.  Is it weight loss you're after?  Well, the time spent on your yoga mat is time that you're not spending eating, so I suppose weight loss could be in the cards for you.

I'm not trying to be glib.  The point is that yoga can help you accomplish just about any intention you set for yourself.  You just have to acknowledge what that intention is, and decide that yoga is going to be your path to that intention.  It was the scoffing attitude, I think, that got me...almost with a tone of judgement..."Does it even work?"  My eventual reply was a chipper "Well, it's working for me.  Give it a try, maybe it will work for you!  I'll be looking for people to test out my teaching with soon..."  I think she was looking for something more concrete, though.  She wanted me to say, "I've lost 10 pounds since I started!"  or "Check out my ripped biceps!" or "Well, I've magically lost the urge to scream at my 8th graders every day!"

Since I had no glory stories to tell, I may not have been as inspiring as she needed me to be.  Sometimes people need something material to grasp onto before they come to the mat...but once they get there, I think the truth dawns on them:  that yoga is not magic, but it can be whatever you want it to be, and that's what's so great about it!  Maybe that's magic afterall...

"By practising Yoga, impurities dwindle away and the light of wisdom dawns." - Patanjali's Yoga Sutras

Come to a comfortable seat...

Where there's homework, there's a struggle.  There's struggle with getting it done/meeting the deadline, the struggle with not knowing what to do, the struggle with fretting over whether it's right.  (Parents of my 8th grade students know these struggles well!)  When you go back to school as an adult, you somehow "forget" what a struggle homework can be when you're the one who's doing it!
Last week, my homework was "Centering" - I needed to write a bodyscan from the sitting bones upwards, reciting phrases (that I came up with) that would help my potential class of students center themselves for practice.  I wrote out on index cards a few phrases that I thought would be effective at helping people "center" themselves - basically preparing themselves mentally and physically for what was about to happen for the next hour on the mat.  When the time came on Wednesday's session to pair up with a classmate and guide them into a centered state, I realized I was woefully under-prepared.  I wrote out something that I thought was great - anyone hearing my words would be sure to feel centered as their yoga practice started, right? - but when I heard the thoughtful, sensitive words of my partner, I realized that I didn't give my "centering" the attention it deserved.  She sounded like a pro - someone who had been teaching for years, using imagery, key phrases, and gentle guiding words to help people settle in on their mats.  When I complimented her, she fully admitted that she "pinched it" (she's English).  I recited my poor attempt, and she was polite, but I knew I left a lot to be desired.  I pledged to give a lot more thought and devotion to this week's homework.
This week, my homework is to create a 3-minute practice (3 minutes, that's IT!) that will center my class, warm them up, and bring them to standing (tadasana).  It is such a hard assignment.  I've already devoted 45 minutes to writing out this sequence and trying it out myself - and I feel like it's not right.  My biggest problem is limiting myself to 3 minutes.  In most of the classes I've taken in the last year, the centering alone takes more than 3 minutes.  How the heck am I supposed to get a beginning yogi relaxed and into a standing posture in 3 minutes?  I tried it out on my husband (NOT a yogi) last night, and it did not go well (to say the least!).
We are supposed to write our practices assuming that everyone in our class is a beginner.  It would be an understatement to say that my husband is a beginner.  On top of that, he has some sort of ankle injury (this foot problem happens on a regular basis, and probably should require medical attention, but that's another blog entry for another day).  I should rally and say "Well, yoga is going to sort these problems out for you - trust me!"  I should be ready and knowledgeable about how to modify the posture so that it helps strengthen these troublesome muscles and joints.  Instead, it devolved because I had written a sequence for someone who was familiar with what I was talking about.  And because it was me, my husband had no problem saying "Ow!  That hurts.  I have no idea what you mean.   I can't do what you're doing!"(I was just sitting on my knees, in a "comfortable seat", btw).   I truly don't think he would have been as vocal in a yoga class with another teacher - he would have "played along".  Either way, it was late, it was me, and he had no problem speaking right up!
That said, ANYone taking a yoga class shouldn't "play along".  If something is uncomfortable, a yogi should feel comfortable enough to speak up and ask for a modification.  And the teacher needs to be knowledgeable and flexible enough to offer up the mods.  Sadly, that's not how it went down last night.  I got frustrated, he got frustrated, and the 3 minutes opened my eyes to exactly how much MORE I have to do.  I don't have to scrap everything - but I do have to be more descriptive and much more considerate.
I guess it's back to the drawing board for me - hopefully, this time it won't take 45 minutes to write out 3 minutes of a sequence.  I'm not ready to throw the towel in.  Yet.

By practicing yoga, impurities dwindle away and the light of wisdom dawns - Patanjali's yoga sutras

Everyone is having their own experience...

Any proficient classroom teacher knows that each child in front of you is having a different experience.  Ergo, the importance of differentiation in your lessons: you have to have multiple entry points to the lesson's content so that the material is interesting and accessible to all of the learners in your classroom.  It's sort of a "Well, DUH!" thought:  Of course every child is having a different experience.  They all bring varying backgrounds to the table and those differences influence the way they learn and perform.  As a teacher, you can choose the degree to which you let this influence your lesson.  GREAT teachers are flexible and talented enough to incorporate a lot of this, weaving a brightly patterned lesson. So-so teachers know what the fabric is supposed to look like and weave the same cloth over and over again.

So, when my Instructor mentioned this concept "Everyone is having their own experience..." during our lessons on Wednesday, why did they have such a profound effect on me?  When she spoke these words, I felt like the clouds opened, raining sunlight down on our class, enlightening me with the most philosophical statement I had heard in weeks!

I understood how she was relating the words to being a teacher in a yoga class - you don't know what injuries someone brings to the table and you don't know what level of yoga experience someone is bringing.  The bottom line is that you have to be careful about the way you phrase certain directions when teaching postures.  You can ask the class to slide their right ankles forward, but one student may be already at his or her edge, and the ankle can't move any further forward.  Another student may be new to yoga, and have no idea why the right ankle has to be in that position.  Other students may be recovering from injuries, and moving deeper into the posture is just too painful.  The main message of this lesson was that as the instructor, you have to be observant of your pupils and choose your words carefully.  Give personal directions when necessary, and keep in mind that "everyone is having their own experience".

Going deeper, I realized that this statement can be applied in every situation, and that's what got me, gave me pause to think.  I looked around at my colleagues in our cohort (which is 18 future-yoga-teachers big!) and listened to their (brief) biographies, realizing that each of us in in the training for different reasons.  Over the next few days, I started approaching a lot of situations with this outlook, and I swear it made me feel more compassionate.  At the kids' sports practices this weekend, every parent was having their own experience - some were fully engaged in watching the practices (even helping with coaching directives), others (like me!) took advantage of the time to catch up on emails and texts before trying to chat with fellow parents and see how the first few days of school were going.  Even at a (really, really fun) birthday party last night (it's not a proper party unless the Taco Truck shows up!!), chatting and catching up with various friends we missed seeing over the summer, everyone was having their own experience.

We are all having our own experience, no matter what situation we find ourselves in.  I encourage you to give it a try, and see if it brings you a little more understanding and compassion.  Driving around town, going to a sports practice, sitting in a class, there are always multiple viewpoints to consider.   What comes to mind at present is my training class.  No one's reason for being there has any more gravitas than anyone else's - we are all parts of the whole (cohort), and I'm sure the fabric of the lessons we weave over the next 9 months will be vibrant, brilliant, and one of the most valuable I've ever been a part of!

It's not what you look at that matters, it's what you see - Henry David Thoreau

September: National Yoga Month!

In honor of National Yoga Month, Athleta is offering a series of "inspirational yoga quotes".  Of course, while you view these quotes, you'll probably notice the insanely fit women wearing some insanely cool yoga gear.  And of course, you can purchase this gear from Athleta.
But for now, let's enjoy the serenity of the model, and be inspired by Yumi's words:

Let yourself be silently drawn by the stronger pull of what you really love.

I hope you'll find yourself on the mat at least once this month!

Lather, Rinse, Repeat

Well, two days in a row, I got up nice and early (yes, the start of school does that to teachers.  You have ALL these nights to get nervous about:  The night before the teachers go back.  The night before you meet your homeroom.  The night before your first full day.  The night before your first Monday.  I might not get a good nights' sleep until October!).  What to do with all that "extra" time?  Well, how about some yoga?

It took a lot more convincing today to get my body out of bed.  My mind kept telling it, "Well, I'm up.  We might as well do something."  The body whined back, "I know if I open my eyes, it's still going to be dark.  The legs are too tired, and the neck is nice and comfy at this angle.  If you make me get up now, I'm never going to make it to the end of the day!  You don't even know what I'm going to wear today!"  To which the mind replied, "Ah ha!  All the more reason to get up!  We need to see if that dress needs ironing."  Of course the dress didn't need to be ironed.  It's so frustrating to my lazy self when the mind outsmarts me!

Anyway, I'm glad I got up.  Since the dress didn't need to be ironed, I put the time to good use by getting on the floor again.  (No way was the mind convincing the body to stumble downstairs in the dark to fetch my mat.  The mind is cue-ing right now: "Maybe you should just bring the mat upstairs the night before.  Then I'll have more ammo with which to trick you in the morning!")

I decided to follow the same practice I followed yesterday morning - Sun Salutations followed by some lunges, reclined twists, and planks leading up to Vashisthasana.  I had a little bit of trouble with my Side-Planks yesterday.  I couldn't hold them for long...but today, TODAY was a different story.  It was measurably easier today (and I was considerably more lazy today!).  My form just felt better - the side wasn't sagging, the legs were stacked instead of staggered, the shoulder wasn't sinking.  Perhaps my practice yesterday was setting me up for doing a little better today.  Now, what if I get up early again tomorrow and attempt the same flow?  Will "practice make perfect"?

Perfection does not come easy on the mat - but practice does bring you, step by step, closer.  Perfection is not the solution in yoga.  The journey is the solution.  It's about what you discover on that journey.  How does each day change your practice?  Do subtle variations make you feel better, stronger, more confident?  All of this experimentation on the mat is what makes yoga so much fun.

So go ahead, Lather, Rinse, and Repeat your flow.  It may never get perfect, but it will always get better!

It's here...

As the sun sets,
so must another summer
(Mexico '10)

Well, dear readers, the first day of school is here.  I was up at a very unreasonable hour, and decided to open my day with some sun salutations that turned into some chest-openers that eventually wound up being a challenging Vasisthasana.  I feel great, and figured I'd take a quick moment to blog before the kids wake up and I have to start yelling at them to get clothes on and out the door.

This is a transitional day for most people I know - the day you send your children back to school, or the day you, yourself, head back to work.  You see, most people I know are parents of young children and/or teachers.  This is a time of parinama, or change.  Various people look forward to it for various reasons.  Some parents count down the hours because their kids have been driving them nuts (especially when the day before school starts is overcast and not exactly ripe for playing outside of the house!): summer is over, and it's time to get back to a routine.  But when you think about it, perhaps the frustration everyone is feeling at the end of summer is a manifestation of the anticipation of change.

Parinama can be stressful for a lot of people.  You're switching gears, you don't know what to expect as the change happens, you're a little unsure, even fearful.  It may take some people longer than others to adjust to this change, and depending on how negatively you and your system are affected by the changes taking place, you may feel like you're suffering.

By quieting your mind and trying to look at things more clearly, you may be able to ease that suffering, and that's where yoga comes in.  My few moments on the mat this morning (hardwood floor, actually - my mat was downstairs and I wasn't coordinated enough to stumble downstairs in the dark to get it) really helped to not only set my intention for the day, but helped me to connect with the inner "me".  Perhaps this will help me feel centered and grounded at I approach this day of Parinama, perhaps it will only last long enough for me to get my kids off to school.  That is what yoga practice is all about.  You keep returning to it, practicing, until you get it right.  You may never get it right - in fact, you will always face parinama, sure as the seasons change, so there is always a need to practice.

September is National Yoga Month, so what better time to start your practice - even if only to help ready you for all that change that's fast approaching!  See you on the mat! (oh, and ps - it's exactly ONE WEEK before I start my teacher training program.  soexcited!)

"Prevent the suffering that is yet to come" - Patanjali's Yoga Sutra II.16

Book Review: The Bhagavad Gita (Chapter 6)

Of all the books I've had to get for my Teacher training, this one right here is giving me the most trouble!   It's not that thick (220 pages), and the whole thing is basically a non-rhyming poem, but the language has a lot of meaning and symbolism behind it, making it a challenge to read more than a few pages in one go.  This book has come with me to Paris, to the pool, to NJ, to Boston, to the nail salon, to my couch, and I'm still only halfway through it.
The Bhagavad Gita is essentially the Hindu bible's equivalent of the Psalms.  It is quite a departure from the Christian Bible I grew up using and reading. Instead of the many allegories, stories and lessons about good and bad people and events that occurred long ago, the Gita is a conversation between a warrior, Arjuna, and his blessed lord, Krishna.  Arjuna is about to enter a great battle, where he will be fighting with and against friends and relatives he has known his whole life.  He decides this is senseless, and refuses to fight.  At this point, Krishna begins to teach Arjuna about wisdom, freedom, and the secret of life.  Sounds compelling, like something I should be paying attention to.  Except I'm not getting it.
Truthfully, I recently finished the chapter on meditation (chapter 6), and it was the first chapter so far that made sense to me.  Now, I have never been one to meditate.  I know my yoga teachers meditate, and I have many friends who swear by meditation as being transformative for their bodies, minds, and spirits.  I've never given it a try - and you can't really know ANYTHING unless you give it a try once - but I can't envision myself getting into meditation.  It takes 20 minutes or more of sitting and emptying your mind so you can connect with your true, inner self.  I know that my time is limited, and I'm used to multi-tasking.  Even when I'm on the yoga mat, I'm thinking about how I will need to switch the laundry from the washer to the dryer when I get home, swandive, but I should stop at the grocery store first on the way to pickup milk, and I need to keep my back foot at at 45 degree angle, was it a light load or a dark load? And now we're windmilling down, and as soon as I get the milk and get home I have to remember to call the roofer to asking about the copper flashing and chaturanga, updog, downdog, breathe, is there anything else we're running out of that I can get when I'm at the store...
If I was taking 20 minutes to empty my mind, how would I remember to do any of those things?  Wouldn't I spend the entire 20 minutes thinking about how I should be exercising because I had gelato last night from the new place in town?  Maybe I'd be thinking about all that laundry I should be folding, or tiles I should be scrubbing, or recycling I could be organizing (I won't kid you, I never organize my recycling.  Shameful, I know.  Disgusting, perhaps, but I just don't have the time).
But in reading this chapter on meditation, I "get it".  "when the mind has become serene by the practice of meditation, you can see the Self through the self and rest in the Self"  What this means is that you'll be like a candle sheltered from the wind - one that does not flicker and is still.  The chapter continues to explain that this is the true yoga; you'll be rooted, stable, courageous.  The book admits that the mind will wander and it is part of the process to reign your thoughts back in for clarity and peace.  Eventually you'll gain freedom and infinite joy.
I've not made plans yet to meditate.  I can, however, take these words with me and keep them in mind as I finish reading the text.  I'm only on chapter 8, and I have 10 more to go.  (Hopefully I'll finish before my classes start!) Anytime my mind wanders, I'll have to reign my thoughts back in so I can focus on the message and meaning of the text.  Eventually I'll gain freedom (even if it's only freedom from reading this dang book!) and find infinite joy!

You are right, Arjuna:  the mind is restless and hard to master; but by constant practice and detachment it can be mastered in the end. - Krishna, in Bhagavad Gita 6.35

A lamentation on the end of summer...

My boys and some friends saying farewell to summer.
(well, they're waiting for the ferry, but it looks like "farewell")

"Summer" doesn't officially end until September 22nd - the Autumnal Equinox - a time when the hours of day are supposed to equal the hours of night.  Despite what the calendar tells us, most people feel that Labor Day weekend is the end of summer.  Stay-at-home/work-at-home parents are rejoicing because they'll finally get a little peace and quiet to get their projects (work and home) completed.  Children are antsy - looking forward to seeing their friends again on a regular basis, but not looking forward to using their brains in an academic way ("Ugh, I have to get up early?"  "There's homework?!?")  Teachers are whining "Where did my summer go?!?"  (I know, I know...you just want to tell those whiners "STFU!" - it even gets on my nerves - and I'm a teacher!)  Parents of college-bound children can't believe those 18 years have flown by.
We can't stop the march of time.  It moves on whether we like it or not.  I try and be a grownup about it and accept it every September.  It's time to be grateful that I have a job that allows for a 104-day (not really, Phineas and Ferb.  Not even close.) break to rejuvenate. Somehow, the end of summer feels different for me this year.  I know I'm on the verge of some dramatic changes.  Obviously the topsy turvy schedule we'll be keeping around here is going to be dramatic.  But I also have a 5 year old who is entering Kindergarten (and "organized" town sports, too), and I'm surprised at how emotional it is this time around.  It's dawning on me that it's the end of the preschool era in our house.  That's dramatic!
He is the younger of my two children, and once he walks through those Kindergarten doors, I won't have a "little kid" anymore.  I mean, physically, he's little, but people will start to see me as one of those mothers "with older children".  He is going to join his brother in the "land of primary school-induced independence"! Even more-so than in nursery school, he is going to learn how to be his own person and make his own decisions.  Soon, he'll not want to hold my hand anymore or give me a hug and kiss goodbye.  I'm starting to understand why people have 3 and 4 kids (but not 5.  That's crazy, no matter how you cut it!  Both my grandmothers had 5 kids...and we've got some crazies.) You want to prolong those feelings.  Sure, it's a pain the neck to change diapers, juggle baby gear, and wipe faces (I can't say tushies, because my 5 year old is still asking to have his tush wiped...some of you with husbands might even comment that they never stop acting like they need their tush wiped!), but that sweet feeling of having a little person who wants you and actually acknowledges that he needs you is so warming.  It also ironically makes you seem "younger".  A mom who feels frazzled with kids pulling at the proverbial apron strings can rest assured that she projects a younger vibe than the "polished" mom who has a few extra minutes to actually accessorize with a bracelet or run some product through her hair because her kids can brush their own teeth, no matter what age that driver's license reports.
So, what am I actually lamenting this year?   Is it the end of the relaxed days with no deadlines?  Is it the dread of cooler, snowier days ahead?  Now that I've typed this, it's starting to dawn on me exactly how vain I actually am...
Oh, and how is yoga going to help with this?  Well, keeping active with gentle yoga stretches that bathe and lubricate the joints with sinovial fluid will keep me feeling sprightly, and at the very least, enable me to continue to wipe my own tush, well into my old, old age!

Namaste.

Flying on the Mat

What a week!  Even still, I found time to fly on my mat, thanks to a great Wednesday session by Josh.
Summer is ending, dear readers.  Soon, it's time to acclimate myself (and my children) to a regular daily schedule, which will be unlike any other September that has come before.  This is mainly because I'll be heading back to school for my Yoga Teacher Training.  I've never been a "student" while being a mother, let along a working professional (unlike a lot of my colleagues, I completed my Masters Degree before I started my teaching career).  Thankfully, I'm comfortable in my skin as both a mother and a teacher, so I feel like I'm up for the challenge - fully admitting that it is going to be nothing short of a challenge.
I digress.  I have roughly one week left to squeeze in as much yoga as I can.  I do feel that "yoga as I know it" is going to change, once I enter the teaching program, so I want to experience flying under someone else's guidance while I have the opportunity, and that's just what Josh presented this past Wednesday - so fitting, as he announced that a sub will be filling in for his class next week.  You all know how I feel about substitute yoga teachers.  This week was enough to last two weeks - as we worked heavily on Balancing postures, which are my strong suit.
It's been a while since I've felt like I've been flying on my mat.  Maybe I've been distracted (trying to recall/practice Sanskrit, thinking about what I should blog, worrying about my bra showing), maybe my focus hasn't quite been on-point, maybe instructors haven't felt much like having us fly.  Whatever the reason, it's been a while, and this past Wednesday, I got a sweet taste of flying.  It renewed everything I love about yoga.
I don't know if it's an "official" posture or asana, but we moved via swandive into a crescent lunge.  For that brief moment before your back foot touches down, you're balancing on one leg, and it makes you feel like you're flying.  I love this feeling, so I extended my leg for as long as I could - Imagining myself as a graceful bird taking flight. I savored the feeling, and whenever the opportunity arose within the practice to do it again, I balanced.  I let my leg go long and slow, my arms go wide and expansive, my breath come in deep, just to prolong the feeling of flying.
Flying doesn't come often on the mat - you have to be in the right zone - but when the moment arises, carpe diem, friends, and enjoy every second!  Maybe when I'm a yoga teacher, I'll try to work in a little flying with every session.  That's how good it feels.


" Be sure to breathe... Hold the posture, not your breath" - Josh

"Big" Birthdays

Happy Birthday, Mom!

Soon, my mother is about to turn 60 (like, tomorrow).  That's a pretty big birthday.  It's not the biggest she or I would ever like to celebrate, but it's a big deal.  These days, though, 60 is positively "young" - Tom Cruise is just 10 years younger than that, and he's still doing hard-core action films.  Madonna is closer to 60 than she is to 50 (I think), and she's still traipsing around stage dressed like a "Carnival Stripper" (thanks, Elton John, for that spot-on analogy!), and don't get me started on the Stones and McCartney.  Some of my friends have siblings who are close to 60, and when I mention my mother is not even 60 yet, they can't believe how young she is (do I look THAT old, that you can't believe I would have a mom who is just turning 60?)

I don't have a "girlfriendy" relationship with my mother - partly a result of distance (we live about 3 hours apart - she, comfortably ensconced in the rural parts of NJ, me, happily running the rat race outside of NYC), but I think it's moreso a result of my independent nature, even from a young age.  Imagine a newly-married 21 year-old (gosh she was young!), excited about the birth of her first baby, looking forward to the cuddling and care-giving, only to find this baby fiercely willful and wanting to do her own thing.  Not long after, followed another baby; a "cuddler" - you know, one of those babies who never wants to be put down.  Ever.  That was my sister.  So there's my 23 year-old mother chasing down a 2 year old who liked to throw the contents of the medicine cabinet into the tub and mix everything up (hey, it was the 70's - before childproof caps!) while trying to placate the screaming 5 month old on her hip.  Next day, said 2 year old decides to climb into the crib and wake the baby from her nap by smearing her (and the walls) with peanut butter.  Man, I can't believe my mom didn't give me away after that.  She probably tried, but no one was stupid enough to fall for it.

This isn't anything several of us hasn't experienced, believe me.  Except my mom followed up with 2 more kids!  My dad was not a banker or highly paid attorney.  There were no nannies or mother's helpers.  There was no grandma around to help out - my parents moved away from their families in western PA when I was 4 or 5, to NJ, where we had no relatives nearby.  In fact, there wasn't even a station wagon!  When my brother was born (I was soon to turn 6) my parents had to buy a "bigger" car - a Ford LTD sedan (you read that right.  A sedan). We picked one in baby blue, because we had a new baby boy.  Not even 30, with 3 kids, my mom couldn't be a stay-at-home mom anymore, so she went back to work.  Except she had to work at night because my dad worked during the day.  And then she had another baby.  I was in 6th grade, had just turned 12, and my mom was probably shitting a brick.  33 years old with 4 kids!  

There are times growing up, especially as a selfish, whiny teen with no concept of the way the world works, where I thought my parents were unfair to me for having so many kids.  I wasn't able to go to sleep away camp.  We didn't go to Disney World every year like my friends did.  In order to go on the Latin trip to Italy, I had to raise my own money by selling M&Ms (that was A LOT of M&Ms.  I "sold" a lot to myself.  I was quite chubby to prove it!).  I remember my mom being my age now, getting ready to send her oldest daughter off to college.  My dad packed my every last belonging into our car (still no station wagon...by that time, he had upgraded to a Buick), and when we arrived on campus 6 hours later, he phoned home to let my mom know we had arrived.  She replied that the new "guest room" was finished!  I never lived home again after that.
Knowing what I know now, I no longer think my mom was unfair; I think my mom was brave (and maybe a lil' bit crazy).  Growing up, it never seemed like she sacrificed much to raise us, but it's glaringly apparent now that she sacrificed an awful lot to raise four kids (especially a pain in the ass like me).  There were probably lots of times that she wanted to have "date night" with her hubby, or go on a "girls weekend getaway" with one of her sisters.  Times where she wanted to go new clothes shopping instead of grocery shopping (again).  She probably wanted a cleaning lady to help out, but she had none of that.  Sure, she cajoled us into helping out now and again, but I know what my sister's bedroom looked like, and lots of those battles were losing ones.

It wasn't all doom-and-gloom raising us.  I know that there have been many, many rays of sunshine in her first 60 years, but my greatest wish for my mom's next 60 years is that they are filled with so much sun that she's gotta wear shades - and I hope they are the biggest, coolest, most stylish shades she can find!
Happy Birthday, Mom!  I know you never, ever read my blog, but I love you and I can't wait to celebrate your birthday with you tomorrow.
xxoo.

YATS fashion review: Zinni yoga top

The Zinni Twist-back Yoga
Tank, as modeled by me!

It's been a while since I've done a yoga clothing review, so, dear readers, it's time!  Today, I'm reviewing a top from a new yoga line:  Zinni, available exclusively on Garnet Hill.  Let me start by saying that I LUUUURVE Garnet Hill, more and more with each catalog that comes in the mail.  I used to feel this way about JCrew, but it's just too pricey/trendy/impractical these days and I just seem to find more things at Garnet Hill that are worthy of my cold-hard cash.
Garnet Hill is not "cheap" by any sense of the word - the clothing can be expensive, but it is also practical because you can wear it to work, on the weekends, or out to dinner.  They do not operate any bricks-&-mortar shops (catalog and online only), which lends them to superior customer service.  They are completely flexible with returns and exchanges, knowing that their customer is not able to try things on before purchasing.  The website features customer reviews which are honest and helpful.  They also sell lots of things that a woman in her late-30s (ugh, I hate to have to type that, but it's true.) might be purchasing in one go:  gorgeous bed and bath linens, cute and funky shoes, delicate jewelry, clothes that are classic with a trendy edge, and now yoga gear!  Need I add that everything is of superior quality?  It is.
One of my favorite things that Garnet Hill does, and I'm not sure how they get away with it, is feature a brand-name product for a little while, and then go ahead and manufacture their own version at a slightly lower price point - without sacrificing style or quality.  Case in point:  Eileen Fisher leggings are supposedly amazing (at $98, I can't afford them), so GH featured them for a while, found some heiresses women who were willing to buy them, and decided to make their own, at a much more reasonable price point: $38.  Same thing happened with French Sole ballet flats.  FS sells for $188, GH sells something similar for $98.  Now they've done it with yoga wear.
I've become a devotee of Lucy activewear.  I am starting to know the fit, I know which shapes flatter my body (important, since I'm usually running an errand or two after class!), and allow me to move through postures.  For some time now, I've been able to purchase Lucy yoga clothes at GH, and now GH has started their own line of activewear called "zinni", no doubt modeled on the Lucy line.  I wasn't really in the market for new yoga clothes, but when one of the tops went on sale, I decided to give the new line a try.  What you see above (front view) and below (back view) is the zinni "Twist-back Yoga Tank".  I ordered a Small (which the description says is "6-8"), my usual size in Lucy.  The zinni top is a little snug across the bust, but it's not restricting.  The bottom half of the tank skims my torso, but it is not loose-fitting.  It's just not as tight as the bust.  If I happen to do any inversions, this top is not going to slide down and reveal my pasty white tummy to my fellow yogis, a plus in my book!  The back of the top it a little interesting, as it has the promised "twist back".  I was worried about my sports bra strap (there is a shelf bra, but I needed a little more support) peeking through, but that doesn't seem to be an issue.  The top itself is made of a high quality, substantial fabric (93% nylon, 7% spandex)

Back view of Zinni Twist-back Yoga top

So, is this my new favorite top?  Not really, but that's not going to stop me from wearing it on the mat (or on the elliptical, for that matter!).  I think I might try a few other tops in this line to get to know the fit and style.  For now, I'm happy for my purchase, and even happier that I was able to snag it at a great price.
The Zinni Twist-back Yoga Tank is available here (on sale!) in 3 colors (black, Castlerock, and Paisley).  Get it while you can!

Why is it....

....that my lovely children, who rarely remember to flush the toilet, suddenly choose to "remember" to flush when I'm in the shower, causing scalding hot water to rain down on me?

Why is it that when I have 15 minutes to pick up my son from camp I make it there in 5 minutes and have to listen to his protest the whole way home? ( "Why did you have to pick me up early?  I'm always the first to leave!!")  That said, if I have 10 minutes to pick up my son from camp, I get stuck behind someone driving a Buick LeSabre who takes the 30 mph speed limit so seriously that they actually drive 25 mph and wouldn't ever dream of speeding up at a yellow light (we hit every red on the way) so I end up being 10 minutes late and have to listen to his protest the whole way home? ("Why were you so late today?  I was so lonely sitting there by myself!")

Why is it that I realize that I'm running low on milk and keep forgetting to pick it up each of the 3 times I run out to the store and when I finally get around to using the milk, I find that I'm 1/2 cup short for the recipe? (and by the way, why am I so disorganized these days that I can't get through the week without going grocery shopping 3 times?  During the school year I plan the menu/ make the list on Saturday and I shop on Sunday.  That's IT).

Why is it that a cloudy morning causes me to choose to slather on SPF 15, but by the time I'm out and about (with no backup sunscreen), the sun makes its appearance and stays out, full force so I get a bit of a sunburn - the day before my dermatologist screening?

I know, I know, these situations happen to any and all of us.  That doesn't make it any less frustrating when it happens to me.  Rather than whinging, I suppose I'd better get to my point and explain what this has to do with yoga.  Murphy's law says that "Anything that can go wrong, WILL go wrong".  These aren't necessarily  Murphy's Law situations.  The pessimistic icon is actually providing encouragement for the rest of us to plan ahead in the event of a less-than ideal outcome.  No, my situations all seem to be a product of bad timing.

Yoga teaches us many things, one of which is patience.  Anyone would do well to practice a little patience when "bad timing" situations arise.  Breathing deep can help you relax a bit and maybe, just maybe, try and see some good in the situation.  Patience can help you realize those positives among the negatives a little more readily.

You see, I can take advantage of the "extra steam" to add a spa-like, pore-opening experience to my shower.  I can be grateful for the LeSabre driver for holding me up so that maybe I missed a situation that might have caused a mishap or even an accident further up the road.  I can be grateful for the opportunity to "experiment" in the kitchen or substitute a lighter alternative (although I must note you can't get much lighter than skim milk) in my crepes.
And what to do about that sunburn?  I suppose I should take a cue from the dermatologist and just slather SPF 30 everyday, regardless of cloud cover.

Whatever the situation, try even one deep breath to help you manage the negative outcomes and turn your lemons into lemonade.

We can all waste a great deal of energy on negativity.  Instead repeating the mantra "Happiness is what happens" can help you feel more accepting of the here and now. - Liz Lark in "1001 Pearls of Yoga Wisdom"